Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Struggling

I am struggling here girls........ Really struggling..   I am not a whiner but need prayer..........  It has been a month since Dad died and mother has moved in with me. She is 24/7.

I am struggling............




Denise

14 comments:

  1. Denise:
    I'll say a prayer for you that God will lift you up and support you in your difficult times. You're never alone. Never.
    xoxo
    Donna

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  2. Hi Denise, YOU are never alone. Prayers for your continued courage and strength during this very difficult time in your life. God holds you firmly in his hands. Know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
    hugz,
    Pam

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  3. Bless your sweet heart, Dear. Praying that something better can be worked out. I pray that God will give you wisdom, peace and strength to endure. Love and Hugs ~

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  4. oh dear heart
    it is good to ask for help not just in prayer but in deed.
    Ask for help from family, social services, friends. Even a dog if you have one to calm her. YOU alone cannot do this without help and support. PLEASE ask for help

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  5. Denise, when I read this, I immediately said "oh, nooo"...

    My heart goes out to you!! It is not going to be easy for you.

    I can not imagine just losing a parent and then having to take care of the other one who is not in good health...physically and mentally....

    I know some of the struggles you're dealing with, as I too dealt with them concerning my mother....and I came real close to losing it!! I could not do it! And I finally had to make some hard decisions that broke my heart but what was best for mother...and for me!

    Please know I will be praying for you, my friend. Please consider now what's best for you AND your mother..... you can't do it alone.

    ~Beth

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  6. Denise, You are in my thoughts and prayers. You are a better woman than I. My mom is 90. I am spending this week with her. She is delightful. But it becomes her life all the time, not mine. She lives at home and has help 9:30-6:00 Mon-Fri. My sister and I "cover" the rest of the time. I'm in the road a lot as I live over an hour away. Didn't mean for this to become about me. I truly feel your situation and my heart goes out to you and your mom...especially while the loss of your dad is so fresh!
    Sandr (formerly Just Playin')

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  7. You, dear lady, will be in my thoughts. I can empathize with you with your loss and having to deal with an aged mother living with you and yours...It's a trial that we all face. And, if it helps any, I've been there long ago...it WAS a struggle, but right now, I wish I could turn back the clock and have my mother at home with me in my arms.

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  8. That is a lot to bear.Losing a parent and now one of them living with you.I am sure its not easy for her either.
    When my Dad passed away my mother still lived alone but relied heavily on me, she was very very high maintenance and demanding,I know she was missing my Dad.
    Losing him after he was very ill then he died, having 2 kids and working full time plus her demands were really working a number on me.
    I was just burnt out... so tired all the time, near tears most of the time.She passed away 2 years ago I miss her so much its almost hard to bear.
    My mother in law has been living with us for 9 years she has alzheimers diagnosed for about 6 months.Hubby and I are both early retired we would give anything to travel and have a bit of freedom.No siblings will come forth to help us now and again.
    Real life... its hard..
    You will be ok I promise,find a hobby you like and start doing it regularly, if your not crafty, go for walks it will do you the world of good.
    Feel free to email me, trust me I have been through it all and survived.Sometimes talking helps.
    Diane

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  9. Praying girl....you are not alone...with you in spirit.
    hugs

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  10. Oh, I thought you had found a place for her..what happened? I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time..I am with you in spirit.
    Mama Bear

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  11. Praying right now, sis....

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  12. Asking Father God to lift you up, and pour His strength all over you. I love you.

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  13. Oh my Denise, I'm so sorry for the loss of your father. I'm praying for you now. He is with you. He will strengthen you. He will hold you up.

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  14. I hear you, Denise.... I feel your struggle :( I know the bondage that 24/7 delivers. I was just reading through some of my comments from my post where you commented and I wanted to check up on you. Now I know why god prompted me to visit tonight - late as it is. I thot mom was going to a home. I didn't know she was with you.

    I've been dad's sole caregiver for 14 months and I just can't do it any more. I would like to be an encourager to you - but I'm not sure how to encourage you in something that has robbed me of life - no matter how you look at it! It has ripped open my heart - my mind is so confused with the back and forth daily episodes. I never know what to expect. I hate getting up to greet the new day. My day stops when I get dad out of bed and it doesn't return to me until he goes to bed. Thus the reason for late nights on the computer. I have to stay up late and get up with the chickens to have a few uninterrupted hours to myself.

    No one understands unless they on in a similar situation. I understand. I just wanted you to know that I care and that I'm praying for you. You need to grieve the loss of your dad. Caring for mom 24/7 is putting that on hold. As if your situation wasn't hard enough - you also have the empty hole that can not be filled by anyone else - but your dad.

    I would suggest a live in caregiver for your mom at the adjacent house. It could be cheaper than college tuition and books. I don't know who you had lined up to care for mom - but if she is young - it would have been all consuming for her anyways. Most people don't have a clue what 24/7 actually means. I can't see a young person lasting much more than a month. Seriously. You know that I right. It would take a very special person to do what we do. I'm not that special. I had not idea!!

    Love and hugs to you

    Patrina <")>><

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