Bad Back and Moving Mom

Mom seems to be doing much better now and the crying has stopped. She is getting up and doing things around the house and puts her dishes in the sink and moves from her computer to her chair and reads and crochets and then back to her computer with out prompting from me. I am very encouraged with her progress and her nurse seems to think that the way we have handled it has been wonderful. She needed to come over here for a while to sort through her feelings but now maybe she can live in her house with me right next door. 

I will never be able to leave and go anywhere unless I have someone to watch her but with her in her home it will be easier on me and her. The nurse even seems to think that after a month or so she might be able to stay at home at night (right now we are going to bring her back over here to sleep)

So I am busy cleaning carpets and putting food back in the fridge.  She just needs her junk food and some of her favorite sodas.  Maybe some lunch food and of course her Frito's and peanut butter cookies. ( I need those things out of my house anyway, hahahah   I love junk food. )

I have hired a little gal to come and stay with mom once in a while. She comes on Wednesdays from 10-3 so that I can go out and just get away and she will also stay on weekends over night when Dennis and I want to get away. That is wonderful but at $100.00 a day we will not do that much right now but when mother's VA benefits start we will be able to use some of that money to have a weekend a month off. I so look forward to that.  

I so believe that what the Lord has called us to do HE will make a way, and for right now it is to take care of mother. There are those that think we are wrong but I really need to do what is in my heart. 

I hope to make the transition of moving mom next weekend. This coming week is busy and I need help from my brother PE. Tisha and Harold have offered to help so I think we will just have a cook out party in the back yard next weekend and combine that with moving Mom. Sounds good to me!

I had to go back to Dr yesterday to get help with my back. Legs going numb now and toes getting worse and the pain  is enough to keep me up at nights. I might be getting 3-4 hours sleep at best. 

She put me on another round of cortisone , which I hate taking because it gives me such headaches but it does wonders then she scheduled another MRI for this coming Tuesday. It has been 2 1/2 years since the last one.

I am trying to hold out surgery at all cost. I have heard such horror stories.Maybe another round of cortisone shots. They seemed to have helped two years ago.

Well , time to fix little Mother her breakfast, she has started eating better so time to fix her something.

Have a wonderful weekend and I am going to TRY to get around to see ALL of you before Monday.

AND DO NOT FORGET ME!   I promise to be a better blog buddy.......  I have mixed feelings about the summer coming to an end. I love being outside but I have more time in the winter to blog!

Bitter sweet huh?

Back To The Blog

It is time for me to get back to the blog and get my game on..........  (what does that mean)?   Thanks for the lovely emails and comments. I had a really really bad day yesterday but I think I have crossed a threshold.  At least I think I have.  

As most of you know I lost my precious dad on July 2nd and even typing that here it does not seem real.  He has been right here out side my back door for 3 years. I walked across that yard 3-4 time a day for a long time and the last few months I spent many hours over there..I think that I have not even began to grieve, however I now have my mom in the house with me and Dennis and I can tell you it has changed my life. I wish I could say for the good but no it is not for the good and I am really really working and adjusting. However with all my adjusting yesterday just caught up with me and I crashed.  

Mom has Dementia/Alzheimer's and her short term memory is about 3 minutes if that.  If that is not bad enough mom is a hypochondriac and has been for years and years and now with the D/A it very very exaggerated.  Most of the day she moans, and if you ask her what hurts she will tell you her head and by the time you get her a Motrin something for her head she says there is nothing wrong with her head and it is her back or her legs or her shoulders.  Hard to know when she really needs something for pain and when the hypochondria in her is talking.  AND that is 24/7, and hardly ever stops.

NOW ladies, I love my mom very very much but there are days..   

She has stopped asking for Dad and now she is wanting to go home, so I am hoping that will pass as well. Lots of days she cries a lot and that breaks my heart so I just cry with her. 

What a roller coaster ride I am on. 

Some of you have told me to make sure and get some help, but ladies the help that should have been here walked away without a second thought about mom or the rest of the family. We have a beautiful little house sitting right next door to us that was offered rent free to stay here and go to college (we offered to pay the tuition and books) she just had to live here and help with mom. She walked away and never looked back and has not even called mom. So be it.  We all make decisions in our lives that we will one day regret and I have no idea how she will handle what she has done. 

I have home health nurse coming in Mon-Wed-Fri. but they are here for just a half hour or so, and the aid and the PT girl is here on  Mondays and Thursdays to bath mom and to do her exercises, but they are here for just an hour or so.

I have hired a gal to come in on Wednesdays at 10-3 so I can plan any appointments like hair and shopping.  It helps but when you talk about 24/7 the few hours that they are here in the house is just not enough. 

BUT today I am much better and after letting go of such disappointment in the other person and letting go of some things that were just dragging me down and looking toward the Father God who is the author and finisher of my faith. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I have decided to leave FB for the most part, I will go over there some because there are friends there that are not blogger's but I am happy to be back here.

I was just overwhelmed with all the cards and ecards when I lost dad...  thank you again, and thank you for the prayers as I figure this out and take care of my mom. 

I am going to stop writing now and get out in the blog and visit.. I have sure missed each of you. 

Struggling

I am struggling here girls........ Really struggling..   I am not a whiner but need prayer..........  It has been a month since Dad died and mother has moved in with me. She is 24/7.

I am struggling............